Airplane Etiquette and Air Rage--What To Do When People Behave Like Absolute Idiots

Airplane Etiquette and Air Rage--What To Do When People Behave Like Absolute Idiots

We've all seen those crazy videos of people behaving like absolute idiots (to put it mildly) on board an airline. Drunk, high or just plain stupid people get on the plane and act out. For some reason they can't sit down quietly for just a few hours. It's called “Air Rage” and it's getting worse every year.

Unbelievably, airlines have seen a 400% increase of Air Rage since 2019. In 2024 alone there are over 2000 cases of people on US airlines crashing out. Airlines have changed policies, (i.e., not serving alcohol in flight) in hopes to cool the tempers of some of these belligerent passengers.

A warning to those who don't want to act properly on the airplane or airport. Punishments have gotten severe. Unruly travelers can receive fines up to $37,000 per violation from the FAA, flight bans (even for life), forced reimbursement for airline division costs and federal charges up to 20 years or even life if weapons are involved.

What is acceptable behavior on the plane? What should you do if someone sitting next to you behaves like an absolute fool? Hopefully you’ll never have to deal with a jerk sitting next to you, but if you do, these tips may help.

Let's be real flying is already a lot.

Overpriced snacks, cramped seats, recycled air, and the silent competition of who gets the armrest. Add in being single, managing your health, and trying not to blow your entire budget to just get somewhere and suddenly, your patience is thinner than those airplane blankets.

So today we're talking about two things:

1. Basic airplane etiquette that way too many people ignore

2. What to do when someone treats you poorly at 30,000 feet

Yes, you can keep your peace without losing your dignity.

The unspoken rule of not being a terrible seat mate

We're not asking for perfection. Just basic decency. Respect the shared space.

You get:

• One seat

• One small slice of armrest (let's be honest, we negotiate this silently)

• Your foot area

You do not get:

• To spread yourself into someone else’s seat

• To kick the seat in front of you like it owes you money

• To treat the row you’re sitting in like it’s your living room

If you’re Bigger, taller, or just need more room no shame. But plan ahead. Book your seat accordingly (aisle seat) when you can and be mindful.

Headphones are not optional

Nobody, and I mean nobody wants to hear your TikTok videos, movies or phone conversations. I can be honest; I had my phone on low while on the plane waiting for take-off. The flight attendant said something to me. She pointed out that I didn’t realize how loud my phone was, and she was right. My phone was on low, but the acoustics had the sound radiating throughout the plane. I apologized profusely and I got out my headphones. Without fail, every time I’m on a plane, I use my ear buds

If you forgot your headphones:

• Keep the volume off

• Read a book

• Take a nap

• Stare into the void like the rest of us

The reclining rule yes, it's controversial

• Reclining your seat is allowed

• Don't slam it back like you're in a NASCAR race

• Check behind you first '

• Don't recline during meals

• Be human about it and be as courteous as possible

Smells matter more than you think

Remember, some people are very sensitive. Strong scents can effect someone negatively especially in closed spaces. What you may think is a light scent can be overwhelming to someone else. In addition, some people are nervous flyers. Something as small as a strong scent can trigger a person. Planes are basically flying tubes of trapped air so maybe skip:

• Strong perfumes

• Hot tuna sandwiches or fish—yes, I've done it (fish n’ chips so not so smelly)

• Taking off your shoes and resting your crusty toes on the seats in front, side or anywhere that takes up someone else’s space

Flight attendants are not your personal assistants

This seems like it should be obvious but so many people do not understand that your flight attendant is here for safety first, period. Yes, the serve you food and beverages and help you however they can, but their job is to ensure everyone is as comfortable and secure as possible. They have a serious job, remember that. Kindness goes a long way and guess what? It often comes back to you in small ways.

When someone treats you poorly on a plane "Air Rage"

Now let's talk about the real reason we're all here. Because no matter how respectful you are, someone else might still act like a nightmare. Here's how to handle it without losing your sanity.

Scenario 1 : The space invader

There's spilling onto your seat. Elbows out. Legs wide. Zero awareness.

What to do:

Start subtle. Shift then reclaim your space calmly

If needed say:

“Hey, I'm feeling a bit cramped could we share the space a little better?”

You don't need an attitude. You don't need to yell. Calm confidence always works better.

Scenario 2: The aggressive or rude passenger

Tone, comments, entitlement you feel it immediately. What to do:

• Don't match their energy

• Keep your responses short and neutral

• If it escalates call a flight attendant immediately

You are not required to handle someone else's behavior. And you never know what is going on with the person. They could be mentally ill or dangerous. Air Rage can be just as volatile as road rage. Always protect your safety!

Scenario 3: The seat kicker/ armrest hog/ loud talker

The repetitive annoyance that slowly drives you insane what to do:

The Seat Kicker:

Turn around politely and say:

“Hey, would you mind not kicking the seat? You probably don't realize it but it's bothering my back.

Thank you so much.”

The armrest hog:

“Could we share the armrest?”

Most people back off when called out calmly. Remember, when it comes to bullies--when you stand up to them, they usually cower. Just feel the moment and stay calm. Never engage with a belligerent person. It's a waste of energy and can send a problematic person over the edge.

Scenario 4: The parent who refuses to correct their children

I had my own incident with an unruly passenger. A kid about three or four was constantly kicking in the back of my seat. I asked the mother if she could get her son to stop. I was very respectful because I know it can be difficult caring for a kid on the plane, so I was trying to be patient. She just shrugged, widened her eyes and pushed out her bottom lip. Essentially saying, “What can I do?” I was flying home and wanted some rest. Of course, the kid kept doing it. The plane was full, so I couldn't request a new seat. Finally, I was so frustrated, I stood up and with a sharp tone I said, “I can't handle this anymore!” I left my seat and took a walk up and down the aisle. Fortunately, when I returned, the kid stopped.

Sometimes even the most well-behaved child can lose it and throw a tantrum or act out in some way. We as fellow passengers can and should have a certain level of patience and grace. However, if a child is unruly and is causing trouble for other passengers, it is the parents’ responsibility to do everything they can to get their child under control.

Don't hesitate to ask for help from a flight attendant if you're having trouble with your kiddo. In fact, your fellow passengers will likely understand if you communicate with them. Don't just let your kid go wild and drive everyone crazy on the plane. Remember, your kid is your responsibility.

Scenario 5: You feel unsafe, or you are targeted

This is different and serious. Trust your gut. What to do:

• Alert a flight attendant immediately

• Use clear language: i.e., “I don't feel comfortable”

• Ask for a seat change if possible

Your safety matters more than being nice. The golden rule is to protect your peace and safety. Here's the truth no one tells you. You are not stuck emotionally just because you're stuck physically. You can:

• Put your headphones in

• Redirect your focus

• Journal, watch something, breathe

• Remind yourself this is temporary

• Even the worst flight ends.

Pack your sanity kit:

• Neck pillow—totally worth it

• Snacks because hangry makes everything worse

• Earbuds

• A charged device (phone, Kindle, iPad)

• Something comforting even if it's just a playlist

• Bring a great book

• Check out the movies and other media the airline offers

Peace is important and you must protect it.

For more peace of mind, don't forget travel insurance. Check out my post, When Your Vacation Goes Sideways: Using Travel Insurance When Things Go Wrong & Travel Disaster Toolkit

My final thought

• You can't control who you sit next to. But you can control:

• How you respond

• How much energy you give away

• Whether someone else's bad behavior ruins your entire vacation

We’re all trying to get somewhere without losing our minds on the way.

If you have a wild airplane story, I would love to hear about it. I would love to interview you and post your story here so your can teach others how to handle a crazy situation while on an airplane.